Category: Articles

The passage we are looking at is Deuteronomy 6:4-9

4 “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

The bible passage we just read is a piece of instruction given to the people of God, but before we get there let’s understand the context so we can make sense of these passages.

Background:

• Israelites escape slavery from Egypt
• They meet at Mount of Sinai and make a covenant with God to obey all his commandments
• After which they walk and wander in the desert for 40 years towards the promised land
• They are now standing right next to the Jordan river preparing to enter the promised land
• And Moses gets up and gives them a speech – which is the book of Deuteronomy.

Even though Moses is the one giving the speech, these are not His words. In chapter 6:1 he says “Now this is the commandment—the statutes and the rules—that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you”

Today since its Elnathan dedication day, we are looking at a certain portion of the speech that is specifically addressed to parents, the way God wants us to bring up our children. 

Elnathan is born to Abiah & Elijah, and they hold the primary responsibility to bring him up. But he is also born into the larger family of God, the church. And therefore, just as these instructions are important to the parents, it is also given to the larger family of God. As Abiah & Elijah is dedicating Elnathan and committing to follow these instructions in the presence of all the witnesses, in some way we are also committing to help, support and participate in it as brothers and sisters, uncles and aunts, grandfathers and grandmothers. Therefore, these instructions are important to us as well.

As we saw earlier, this instruction is from God and not from man.

And here’s why this instruction is important. We need to heed to them so that everything goes well with us and that we enjoy God choicest blessing for our life as written in v3. “Hear, therefore, O Israel, and be careful to do them, that it may go well with you, and that you may multiply greatly, as the Lord, the God of your fathers, has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey.”

The instruction is to diligently teach our children something. The word diligently means to do it with care and with a sense of duty.

And what is he asking us to teach our children?

V4-5. 4 “The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.”

The instruction is to teach them to love God more than anything else. 

We love God in response to His Love for us – In the Old Testament, the people of God experienced Gods love through his care and hand of protection over their lives. 

But for us, the privileged ones in the new covenant, we experience God’s love through His son Jesus who came to this world to die for our sins and repair our broken relationship through his sacrifice on the cross, so that we don’t suffer in our Sin but rather live victorious lives knowing that Christ is our permanent Shepherd & Caretaker.

What we are asked to teach our children is to point their hearts to Christ, and as their hearts are transformed by the Gospel they inevitably reciprocate in loving God. This is the primary and most important command that God has given us to bring up our children. 

To accomplish this goal, I want to put across two words for us to take home and meditate on.

The first word is TALK … communicate … have conversations.

Research says one of the primary reason children grow up having behavioural issues & other disorders are because of the lack of communication between parents and children.

Parents should be the primary voice talking to the child – obviously, to talk more you need to spend more time – and more than talking about studies, career & marriage, what we need to talk most is about God’s love, about His son Jesus, the Gospel, and the Gospel stories that change and transforms us.

We do that by daily evaluating our day with our child and pondering on the conversations we have. Worldly vs Gospel-centered.

The natural tendencies are to talk about the problems and grievances of this broken world, family problems, school problems, college problems, social problems and sadly even church problems. 

What our children need to often hear are not problems of this broken world but the hope we are offered through the Gospel, stories of redemption experienced amid this broken world. Not the story and events that make them frustrated and angry towards each other, but stories that make them fall in love with Jesus and His redeeming qualities.

And I say that because unfortunately, that is not what is spoken and communicated in our Christian homes today. It is the outside world talking to them through TV or other mediums, the negative & hurting hearts of parents & people influencing them negatively.

Abiah & Elijah, you are called to be the primary communicator in Nathan’s life, communicating the Gospel, leading his heart to love God with all his heart, mind and soul.

verse 7-9 says “talk of them when you sit in your house (eating food, playing games, doing house chores), and when you walk by the way (going to school, going to the market, taking a jog, driving the car), and when you lie down, and when you rise. (telling bedtime stories, the day that went by, the day that will start tomorrow) 8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. (sticking bible verses around the house, on the fridge, in their bedroom) 9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates” (every place visible to the child where he is reminded of God’s love)

Talk. Talk. …….

The second word is ‘Walk’… to model

Our talking will only be effective and deliver desired results when you also Model it for them as we communicate. Let’s get this right, We can’t be parents, friends, brothers & sisters that say “Do what I say but don’t do as I do”… that won’t work, that doesn’t yield results. That is called Hypocrisy, as the child grows he will imitate the same attitude.

If we want our children to love God with all their heart, mind and soul.. we have to first love God with all our heart, mind and soul. 

I know of Christian parents who encourage their children to attend Sunday schools so that their hearts are moulded in godly ways but they won’t attend church meeting and community gathering. That doesn’t work my brothers & sisters. We have be an example first.

Yes, our children will hear what we say, but you know what? They will do what we do. Just talking is not enough.

To model godliness to one another is a spiritual principle as Paul says in 1 Cor 11:1 “Follow me as I follow the example of Christ”

But what do we model? 

We don’t model a superficial perfection to our children when we are imperfect in nature because of the indwelling sin in our flesh. Rather, out of all the aspects of life, we model to our children the one that should stand out is our lifestyle of continual repentance and faith in God. 

It’s ok to expose our imperfect nature to them, that’s the truth. But let them also see our repentant heart in prayer and our trust in Him to help change us through the transforming work of the Holy Spirit. Let them see and experience the long term transforming power of the Gospel in our life. Let them learn that we all need His grace to sustain and be fruitful in this sinful and broken world. Let them grow learning that Jesus should be the ultimate goal of all our lives.

As I conclude, don’t forget the two words. TALK & WALK. That’s the only way to do this right.

You know that God moves in a mysterious way when someone like me is asked to write about how a man should pursue a woman, for marriage, in a God honouring way. And I’m sure of this, because I’m going to give it a try.

So, here’s my “7 Step Plan on How to Pursue a Woman“.

Ok. Not really. However there are a few things I would keep in mind if I was going to pursue a woman – even though I’m not sure if all this would apply across different cultural backgrounds – but these are important or importanté as they say it in German (or Spanish, I don’t know, I saw it on YouTube).

And so, here goes:

You need to be following Jesus wholeheartedly

It starts here, man. It starts with believing in the good news of God, that Jesus Christ lived, died and rose from the dead to save sinners from the wrath of God, to bring sinners to God, to the glory of God. Following Jesus means living in obedience to Him, fighting and killing sin daily, putting on, pursuing and displaying godly character. Being involved in the life of your church. Being a man who is diligent and devoted to working hard at his job. Being a man who does not shy away from standing up for his faith.

These are essential if you really want to pursue a woman for marriage.

Tell people about it

Please do everyone a favour and tell people about it. No, you don’t have to tell the couple visiting your church gathering for the first time. Tell the godly and mature people in your church. Tell those with whom you consistently fellowship with, the ones who love you and care for you.

There is much value in doing so, for they can provide direction and counsel, which you would need in abundance.

Do it with honour

Here’s the part where you aim to walk in holiness. If you mean to pursue her, speak forth words declaring your intentions, in other words, ask her out.
No pokes, no likes or hearts on social media. You also need to make it clear why you’re asking her out for lunch/dinner/chai-pani, meaning you make it clear that you’re doing this with the intention of getting married, God willing, and not simply for the relational intimacy.

This implies that you end up having potentially difficult and awkward conversations about each other, about the future etc. Does this mean that your dates have to be a stressful affair? By no means! Enjoy the company, make her laugh, recount times when you made yourself look like a World Champion Buffoon**, as you get a foretaste of what hanging out would look like “till death do us part”.

Honour everyone

Right. So there’s a lot of honouring to do. As an outflow of your love and honour for God, honour her. Treat her with respect in your words and actions. Conduct yourself in all purity towards her, in both behaviour and thought. Keep the physical touch to the bare minimum (like touching her feet when you greet her).

Honour your parents too. Get them involved from the beginning or from the time you see fit, depending on your equation with them.

It’s tough, I know

Putting yourself out there, being mostly uncomfortably and facing possible rejection are all realities in this (sort of) fool’s errand. But I believe this is the way to go because I believe that God designed men to lead, provide and protect in every sort of relationship he has including the romantic relationship.

Unless of course, you’re an arranged marriage kind of guy (nothing wrong with that, just make sure she’s a believer) or someone who talks and talks to a girl and at the hour of reckoning, you confess your feelings to her.

May God give you all the grace needed, and more, as you pursue her.

“Author’s Note: This article also appears on Quiricus“

There is no doubt that as a follower of Jesus, we all are called to participate in His Kingdom work. To reach out to the lost with the good news of the Kingdom and baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit is the ultimate goal of all our lives.

This call is not just for the pastors, leaders and full-time workers; the call is for every single believer.

We have to remind ourselves daily that this world belongs to God and every organism around us is created by him to bring glory to his name. We are not at the centre of the universe, and everything doesn’t revolve around us. The world belongs to God, and He does what pleases Him.

Even as we look back at world history, we see generations after generations, men and women tried exalting and placing themselves above God, but none were successful. All their lives were numbered by God who created them, and ultimately, God used even their foolish endeavours to Glorify His name on the earth.

A great career, higher education, marriage, parenting, accumulating money, buying properties, travelling the world, etc. are not the real goals. Instead, they are the means & pleasures given to us so that we can pursue the real goal which is to be the light and salt of this earth and to preach the good news of Christ to the lost and called ones in this world.

Now, regarding Evangelism & the preaching of the gospel, I’ve learned that there isn’t one way to do it. It depends on the culture, the context, our personal calling, our giftings, and many other factors that are unknown to us.

And therefore, I wouldn’t propagate one particular approach or method of preaching the good news.

Even trying to mimic Evangelism as done in the Acts of Apostles may not work in our culture and context because people in that culture had a framework and a reference point to which the Apostles would direct their hearts as they presented the gospel, and it made sense to them.

Our culture – the ideas, customs, and social behaviour of our particular people or society are so very different in so many ways, we have to consider all these factors even as we sense the direction in which the Holy Spirit is leading us in life.

I believe wherever we are in life, the people group, the workplace, the society, etc, God placed us on purpose. And I don’t think he expects us to drop all our current connections and influences in which we have been sent for his glory. Of course, there are exceptions.

Instead, he is expecting that wherever we are, we become the light and salt and take a posture of humility, dependence & courage, as His ambassadors.

As Christians, when we think about our current culture, there are two directions in which we can go. One is towards legalism and the other towards Licentiousness.

A person with a bent towards legalism will look at the culture and point out all the wrong things, condemning them in their hearts, thereby adopting a withdrawal mentality and fail to reach out to them.

On the other hand, a person with a bent towards Licentiousness will look at the culture and accept everything as it is and eventually live an immoral and disobedient life, taking the grace of God for granted.

The gospel should guard our hearts against both these approaches and drive our thoughts, actions, beliefs, pursuits to give us the right posture for Evangelism.

Here are 3 ways in which the gospel helps us engage with our culture.

1. Gospel helps us appreciate the culture

As we grow and mature in the gospel, it should give our heart the humility to appreciate the contribution of everyone out there, whether they are Christians or Non-Christians, rich or poor, high standard or low standard, the neighbour next door or the cab & rickshaw drivers on the street.

God ultimately uses everyone in the world to accomplish a higher purpose that may often go unseen like the milkman that delivers milk at your doorstep, your unbelieving relative, your manager who gets on your nerves, your colleague who works in your team, the vegetable vendor in the market, the traffic police etc.

They all exist, and God in his sovereignty showers his common grace on all and uses them to glorify his name ultimately.

It is because of our fallen state that the culture and people love and live in darkness more than light, and God is not unaware of it. He fully knows and understands.

When Jesus came to this earth more than two thousand years ago and started interacting with people, I don’t think he had any kind of culture shock when he saw the winebibbers, prostitutes, gamblers, etc.

The way he interacted with the culture and people group should teach us what real cultural engagement looks like. He sat among the drunkards and the prostitutes and pointing them to the Kingdom of Heaven.

Likewise, we also see Paul interacting with the Gentiles.

The gospel should open our eyes to see human depravity and lostness, cultivating a heart of compassion and love towards them.

2. Gospel helps us provoke the culture

As we become part of the culture, the gospel helps us to see the heart idols that are at play in people’s heart, leading them to death and destruction; broken marriages, sickness, depression, loneliness, sinful tendencies, hatred, etc.

And as these idols show up, we address them and provoke their thoughts to think and point their hearts to the one and only permanent solution, the cross of Calvary where our Saviour Jesus died to redeem and break the chains of Sin forever, hence giving us a life of abundant blessing, joy and peace.

3. The Gospel helps us shape the culture

Of course, as we put ourselves out there, we also have to guard our hearts. If our hearts aren’t guarded with prayer and intimacy with Christ, it is easy to fall on the other side.

Here are a couple of questions we have to ask ourselves as we indulge in the culture continually.

i. What are things in the culture we should accept without being disobedient to God?
ii. What are things in the culture we should reject, the ones that are a direct violation of God’s word?
iii. What are things in the culture we can revive, without letting it influence our hearts?

Jesus’s interactions with an ungodly culture didn’t rob him of his Holiness. Paul’s interaction with gentiles never distracted him of his purpose and lose his identity in Christ.

And even as we put ourselves out there in the culture, we need to stay guarded all the time by making ‘Intimacy with Jesus’ the goal of our lives. Before we are called to do things for Jesus, we are called to be with Jesus.

Finally, as children of the light, let us be the light. Let’s keep moving by breaking all cultural barriers and making a difference in the lives of people around us, one at a time.

‘So we see that they could not enter in because of unbelief.’ Hebrews 3:19

It’s tragic to see how the Israelites failed to truly trust and believe in God in spite of experiencing His love and faithfulness and being witnesses to so many signs and wonders that He performed among them.

You would think that they did not enter God’s rest because of disobedience but as seen in v18, disobedience was an outgrowth of the unbelief. Disobedience was sin exhibited at the surface level (behavioural sin) whereas the root cause of that (motivational sin) was really unbelief.

In the midst of adversity instead of trusting God, the Israelites became hard and unbelieving and did not trust God’s goodness – to lead and protect and provide and satisfy, just like He always did.

Though it’s really easy to point a finger at the Israelites’ stubbornness and shake my head in disgust, the Holy Spirit gently reminded me of my own sin.

There are instances that I too don’t truly believe that Christ’s work is sufficient for me. When I struggle with something and feel like a failure, it is because I don’t really believe what He has said about me and the promises He has given me in His word. 

When things don’t go the way I planned or if I’m frustrated that I messed up, it’s because I don’t really believe that God is good at ‘all’ times, that He is faithful and will work out everything for my good in His time. 

Instead, I get deceived and fall for the lies and accusations that the enemy feeds into my head. The result? Depression, anxiety, fear, hopelessness, anger, discouragement and so on. 

“A life of true living is a life of faith in Jesus, a life of believing in Jesus in the everyday stuff of life.” – Jeff Vanderstelt

I need to believe and speak the truths of the gospel – What is true of Jesus, of what He accomplished through His life, death and resurrection and what is true of me as I put my faith in Him, in the struggles I face and the everyday stuff of life.

But I do need help to battle my unbelief. I’m so grateful that I find it in the believers around me who pray for me, exhort me and strengthen me in my faith. 

When our belief centres on the superiority of Jesus Christ and His atoning work for me as a faithful High Priest, as mentioned in Hebrews 2:17, we can enter God’s rest.

May we hold fast to our confidence and boast of our hope in Jesus Christ firm to the end!

Dear sister,

I write this to you out of concern because it will break my heart to see you settle for less.

Let me reaffirm that the desire for marriage is a good thing. It is a good thing because God himself instituted it. God said “it is not good that man should be alone” and he made the woman. He then mandated both the man and the woman to exercise dominion over the earth.

However, this thought has silently crept into your heart: that marriage is the one thing that will make you happy. You believe that connecting with someone, companionship with someone, having someone – who you think – genuinely cares for you and is kind to you, is the point where your life has reached its zenith.

But I see that by your great desire for marriage, you choose to settle.

Sister, please hear me out. Even though I am a man of no experience, there are things in the Word of God that I have read, along with various other sources that have led me to this conclusion: that this life is not about us. It’s about God. Everything is about God, it always has been.

Look at the Scriptures with me.

Psalm 19:1 – “The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork.”

Ezekiel 36:23 – “And I will vindicate the holiness of my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, and which you have profaned among them. And the nations will know that I am the LORD, declares the Lord GOD, when through you I vindicate my holiness before their eyes.”

Ephesians 3:10 – “…so that through the church the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places.”

1 Peter 2:9 – “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you from darkness into his marvellous light.”

God created the sky and the heavens to show his glory. God wanted to show his holiness to the nations through the nation of Israel. God wants to show his manifold wisdom through the church.

Most importantly, God saved you so that you would be his so that you could proclaim his excellencies.

All these verses are pushing one idea; that all things exist for God. Marriage is no exception.

You know what the apostle Paul writes in Ephesians 5 when he speaks about marriage. He says that marriage is a profound mystery because marriage actually reflects the relationship between Christ and his bride, that is, the church.

Now, do you see, dear sister, why I say you’re settling for less? Because your life is meant to be about making much of God, or in the words of apostle Peter “to proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light” and your marriage is to be reflecting the “profound mystery” of the relationship between Christ and the church.

That is why it is of utmost importance that the man with whom you wish to be with, and eventually marry, understands the gravity of all this. If he does not see the high calling we believers have, and if he does not believe in the real purpose of marriage, you will most likely lose your way and worse, sin against God.

We haven’t touched on the fact that the Bible clearly states that marriage with an unbeliever is sin, in fact, I could have just started the letter with that, but God doesn’t just tell us to do or not do something just because it is right or wrong. He does it because he knows that to do right, that is, to follow him is life, and the opposite is death.

Sister, I know these are heart-wrenching words, but I ask you, please heed to them. Listen to those around you as well. These are brothers and sisters who deeply care and are very fond of you.

I hope you do see and I pray that God would make “your hearts blameless in holiness before our God and Father at the coming of our Lord Jesus” – 1 Thess 3:13.

Yours lovingly
Brother

Author’s Note: This article also appears on Quiricus.

Psalm 37:4 says “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

Does that mean that God will give everything we desire if we delight in Him?

Absolutely No!

Why? Because “All the ways of a man seem right to him, but the Lord evaluates the motives” – Provers 16:2

Every desire in a man’s heart can come from a right or a wrong motive, and only the desires with the right motive will pass the test through Gods filtering lenses.

Because of the sin in our heart and the evil influences of this world upon our lives, our dreams and desires are worldly and ungodly. We desire the things that please us and satisfy our sinful cravings.

But when the True Gospel of Jesus, the power of His Salvation, transforms our lives, it convicts us of our sinfulness, turns our lives upside down, one which looks opposite to the ideas of the world.

For some, it happens in a moment, and for others, it occurs gradually.

All of a sudden the cravings for the world, the taste for ungodly pleasures start diminishing from our lives. The Gospel brings total transformation.

But it only happens when we’ve truly understood the message and the purpose of the Cross.

We are created for God and for His pleasure. And the only way he gets pleasure out of us is when we willingly love him, obey him, adore him and worship Him.

But instead of doing the right thing by surrendering to God and his purposes, we underestimate His power and ignore His presence. We chose to rebel against him and opt for the temporary pleasures of this world instead of choosing him.

We make our lives the centre of everything, not realizing that our lives on earth are temporary and no matter how strongly we hold on to this world, gain from its pleasures and things, in the end, our lives we will be forgotten and our possessions will be taken away and given to another.

The fool says in his heart, “There is no God.” – Psalms 14:1 (Bible). We are fools when we fail to acknowledge God’s presence and His power.

We will all die in our physical bodies but what’s more crucial is the fact that our soul will continue to live in the Spiritual realm, either in hell or in heaven with God, depending on the choice we make on this earth.

But the good news is that God has not left us in our deteriorating condition. Instead, he has made a provision for us through his son Jesus to fill our hearts with hope and joy. John 3:16 (Bible) says “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”

The only way we respond to God’s love is by repenting of our sins, believing in Jesus and seeking his kingdom.

And when the Gospel changes our lives and influences our minds, our cravings for the world and the things in it are taken away.

When we start seeking His face and His kingdom, Jesus also promises that “all other things will be given to you.”

And yes, God will fulfil all the desires of your heart, but only those that are fueled by the Gospel and influenced by right motives.

“Ladies first”.
“Let the women and children go first”.
“That’s not how you treat a woman”.
“That’s not how you speak to a woman”.

These phrases have been used by scores of people over the years, in fact, you’ve probably used these phrases yourself or you heard them being said by someone somewhere.

If you stop and ponder upon these phrases, you get a sense that women are supposed to be treated in a particular way. You get a sense that women are to be given a special care, that they’re supposed to be given the priority in various situations. In spite of the increased calls for “gender equality”, there is the unspoken expectation that men ought to be tender with women.

This is no coincidence. This is how God intended it to be. Within God’s design, he meant for men to show a caring protection and strong tenderness towards women. Furthermore, when God designed man, he endued their souls with a caring disposition towards women. As John Piper states in one of his sermons, these are “deep dispositions or inclinations, written on the heart of men”.

Let’s take a look at a few verses from the Bible that shed some light on what we’re trying to get at:

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her”  – Ephesians 5:25

“Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.” – Colossians 3:19

“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” – 1 Peter 3:19

A simple reading of these verses shows us that husbands should not be harsh with their wives, should be understanding, should show honor; moreover, husbands should be like Christ who gave up his life to save and sanctify his bride, that is, the church. The care Christ shows for his bride goes to the point where he doesn’t want any “spot or wrinkle or any such thing” on her (Eph 5:27).

One gets an overwhelming sense that Christ deeply cares for his bride; and husbands taking their cue from Christ, are called to follow the same pattern modeled by Christ and care for their wives.

The Bible makes it very clear that husbands should show a special care to their wives.

Now, do men start showing this kind of care only after they’re married? Or do they start when they’re engaged or when they’re dating?

If indeed God designed men in such a way, when do men start behaving in accordance with their design?

To answer these questions in the words of John Piper “Men, as men, everywhere, all the time, bear a burden, under God, to care for the well-being of women”.

That’s right, the answer is always. Whether you’re single, engaged, or married, you still have a burden to give this special care to women according to the differing relationships you have, meaning the care an unmarried man shows to an unmarried or married woman would not be as deep and personal as the care shown between a husband and wife.

How does this special care play out practically in our lives? We could probably start by following the phrases that were mentioned in the beginning of this article. In other words, we look for opportunities where we can put the woman first, ready to serve at all times. It could mean offering to lift the heavy bags of whatever she’s carrying, or catching a rickshaw for her before you get yours, or seeing that she finds a place to sit before you find yours.

I personally believe, however, that the care we men can show can go beyond just the physical. I believe we can look to protect women emotionally too. To put it simply, protecting women emotionally would mean safeguarding their hearts and minds, which mostly entails how you speak to them and your behavior towards them.

It could mean using a gentler tone while speaking to them and being polite at all times. Or minimizing the banter with them and holding back those sarcastic comments. It could mean monitoring your online behavior which could result in stopping the unnecessary texting or the excessive interaction on social media. I would go as far to say that you don’t hug them, in greeting or when saying goodbye, unless they hug you first, out of respect.

All this is done to communicate to the women that we esteem them in the highest regard and that we don’t want to use our words to make them doubt their value in Christ, nor do we want to mess with their feelings.

Let me conclude by expressing a hope: I hope we men would see living out God’s design as a divine mandate. I hope we would see the importance of protecting and caring for our women in ways that reflect God’s design. To Him belong dominion and glory forever and ever.

Amen.

Author’s Note: This article also appears on Quiricus.

We all know that it is more blessed to give than to receive however do you know that it is also blessed to receive?

In the early days at The Gathering Church, we used to meet at a home following which we all had lunch together. During these lunch times, it gave me great joy when it came to serving the people, be it serving food, offering second helpings (in some cases third), doing the dishes, cleaning up etc.

Even in my days at a youth group, I had such opportunities to serve. The believers at the youth group and at The Gathering, seeing this, affirmed that this is a gift given to me by God and they were greatly encouraged to see the grace of God working in my life. This in turn encouraged me to continue in the same grace.

However there was something that crept in unnoticed. This was a subtle thought pattern which led to me to behave in a way that did not reflect the gospel.

“What was it?” you’re probably asking. It was this: I found that I had a problem asking or accepting help from most people, in almost all forms. In any kind of settings where the need to serve arose, I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of the service.

This was a manifestation of two sins, I believe. One is pride and the other is a simple lack of finding my full worth in Jesus.
Since being served rather than serving meant adopting a position of humbleness, I found it quite hard to swallow albeit at a subconscious level. It also created a feeling of owing someone, again at a subconscious level. The other reason – my sense of unworthiness – led me to believe that I am not worth being served.

Hence I would do most things myself, whether it be serving food for myself, getting my own glass of water, and the like. I found it hard to ask or accept help in the small things which meant there was seldom a chance of me asking or accepting help when it came to the bigger things.

Surprisingly, what brought this sin to light was a book on marriage, Tim Keller’s “The Meaning of Marriage” to be precise. Consider this excerpt from his book:

“Kathy and I remember a pivotal incident in our marriage that occurred during a visit to New England, where we had attended seminary. The two of us along with our three sons were staying with friends, and I had hoped very much at some point to be able to get away to the nearby seminary bookstore, just to see what was new, maybe pick up a few interesting books.

But I knew that it would mean precious time taken out of the other things we were doing together as a family, and it would leave Kathy with the full burden of caring for the kids.
And so I was afraid to ask for it. Instead, I hoped Kathy would guess about my desire and simply offer the time to me. But she didn’t do it, and soon I found myself deeply resentful of her “failure” to read my mind. Surely she should know how much I love visiting the bookstore! I work very hard – why doesn’t she propose that I take the afternoon away simply because I deserve the break? I began to imagine that she knew I wanted to go to the bookstore but was dead set against it.

After a long, grumpy day helping Kathy with the kids and feeling sorry for myself, I finally told her how sorry I was that I had never made it to the bookstore. She was rightfully unhappy with me, and said, “Yes, that would have been inconvenient for me, but I would have loved to have given you that freedom. I never get a chance to give you gifts, and you’re always helping me with something. You denied me the chance to serve you!”

I immediately realized however, that I didn’t want to be served. I didn’t want to in a position where I had to ask for something and receive it as a gift. Kathy was deeply disappointed and insulted that I had robbed her of the opportunity to do so. We drove home in angry silence as I tried to figure out what had happened.

Finally I began to see. I wanted to serve, yes, because that made me feel in control. Then I would always have the high moral ground. But that kind of “service” isn’t service at all, only manipulation. But by not giving Kathy an opportunity to serve me, I had failed to serve her. And the reason underneath it all was my pride.”

As Keller himself states, his sin, which was pride, stopped him from asking or accepting help from his wife.

If you have seen such a pattern in your thinking and behavior, like I have, then let us look to the gospel to counter this, since central to the gospel, is Jesus Christ, who did all that was needed to be done in order to save us for all eternity

Think about this: When you first heard that “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners” (1 Tim 1:15), what else did you do other than to humbly receive this saving work through repentance and belief? And when you heard about the “kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God” (1 John 3:1) didn’t this knowledge break down your false sense of unworthiness?

The gospel empowers you to serve one another humbly and it also humbles you to be served by one another.

Endeavor to gain a deeper understanding of the gospel through studying the Bible, through prayer, being part of and serving in the church, reading good books etc. so that the truth takes root and transforms your heart to be a person who gives and receives well, thus glorifying God through Jesus Christ.

Author’s Note: This article also appears on Quiricus.

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Last week, as church we prayed through the Lords prayer step by step from Matthew 6. Here’s how we were able break down each verse and then pray through it.

‘Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.’

Glorify our God, meditating on His greatness.

• Our God who reigns in infinite power and wisdom, who exists from all eternity, the great, wonderful and righteous king is ‘our Father!’
• He is omnipotent (all powerful), omniscient (all knowing), omnipresent (all present), faithful, merciful, the beginning and end of every person that will ever live.
• Our God is holy, and He is jealous for our undivided affection.
• He is high, and also dwells with the lowly. He is a king, and he is a father. He is far above us, and yet ready to come to us.
• Pray that God would make his name supremely known and valuable in the minds and hearts of people.
• Pray that Gods name would be ‘Hallowed’ i.e His name would be feared in each of our lives, that we would not fear man but always revere Him.
• Pray that our heavenly Father would cause our hearts to trust, obey, fear and glorify Him alone.

‘Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.’ 

• Gods kingdom to be established here on earth, gathering the redeemed from every tribe, tongue, people and nation.
• The earth to be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord as the waters cover the sea (Habakkuk 2:14).
• God our Father to bring His kingdom in a greater measure today, beginning in our own hearts and pouring out to our home, community, city, nation, and to the ends of the earth.
• May the rule of Christ be extended into every area of our lives. May we seek to live under the kingly protection and provision and guidance of God.
• As we walk with God, may He work on our hearts, our affections, our desires to know what is His good and perfect will.
• May the Lord cause us to obey His will. Help us to do His will with fervency and undivided devotion. Let Him mold us and make us respond to the needs of the world and be part of bringing Heaven to earth.

‘Give us this day our daily bread’

• We ask our Heavenly Father for bread that teaches us honesty. We do not ask for the bread out of other people’s mouths, nor the bread of deceit (Pr 20:17), nor the bread of idleness (Pr 31:27) but the bread honestly gained. We ask for our ‘daily bread’ which teaches us not to worry about tomorrow but constantly to depend upon the divine Providence of God.
• We come to God in a spirit of humble dependence, asking Him to provide what we need and to sustain us that we might accomplish what He has called us to do, trusting that He will provide.
• We pray that God would give us ‘this day’ which teaches us to renew the desire of our souls toward God, as the wants of our bodies are renewed.
• May our natural desires be subject to spiritual desires; fruit-bearing desires, gospel-spreading, God-centered desires.
• As we delight in the Lord, in hallowing His name, seeking His kingdom and doing His will, we’ll pray that all our natural desires will be transformed into God-related desires.

‘Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.’

• Our debt includes secret sins as well as public ones, deliberate sins as well as sins committed in ignorance. And when all our sins are added together, they place us in God’s eternal debt.
• We come to God as sinners in need to be forgiven everyday. We know we don’t deserve it, we ask for mercy. We ask God to draw us into the freedom of His love, the love He gave when His Son died in our place.
• We thank God because He is our loving Father who offers full and free forgiveness.
• May the Lord cause us to forgive from the heart which is the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). We have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer we who live, but Christ who lives in us. We are a new creation and the mark of our newness is not yet perfection but a persistent inclination to forgive.
• May we continue to forgive because Christ through His grace, mercy and compassion has forgiven us.

‘Lead is not into temptation but deliver us from evil’

• As we face endless choices between belief and unbelief, obedience and disobedience, we pray that God would hold us back from stepping into temptations.
• We pray for Gods grace to help us stand strong when we face temptations or find ourselves in situations where our faith is tried and tested. We trust in the Lord (not ourselves) for deliverance; to keep us back from the entanglements of over powering temptations, to guard us from the enemy and all his works, to grant us to walk in holiness before Him all our days.
• Let’s pray that we remain watchful and discerning, saturated with the word of God, gripped with the goal set ahead of us and committed in doing Gods will thereby not yielding to the enemy’s enticements.
• “Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:14-16

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[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Happy Independence Day

We thank God for this nation and for what He is doing to bring the hope and love of Jesus to people all across the country. We pray for our country in these specific ways –

• Where there is bondage, we pray for liberty for the captives and release for those held in slavery. (Isaiah 61:1)
• Where there is oppression, we pray that God would work righteousness and justice. (Psalm 103:6)
• Where there is barren and unproductive land, let there be abundance and overflow to the ground itself, causing it to bud and flourish. (Psalm 65:9-13)
• Where the dominion of darkness reigns, we ask that God would bring people into the Kingdom of His beloved Son in whom they have redemption, and the forgiveness of sins. (Colossians 1:13)
• Where the thief has come to steal, kill and destroy, may the Lord give life in abundance to the people of India. (John 10:10)
• Where there have been many paths that claim to lead to God, we pray that men, women and children would come to the One who is The Way, The Truth and The Life. (John 14:6)

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