The passage we are going to cover today has been a fascinating one for the church over the ages. More so in recent times this has been a reason for a lot of fascination because it deals with the different roles that men and women have within the church. And the goal of the sermon is not to make it a more fascinating topic but to recognize God as absolutely fantastic due to His wisdom and ways!
I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; 9 likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, 10 but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works. 11 Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve; 14 and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor. 15 Yet she will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control.
3 weeks back we looked at the passage in chapter 2 which urged us to pray all kinds of prayers for all kinds of people…especially those that are harsh toward us. And what was the reason for this: is that they come to knowledge of the truth! One of the key points we were challenged on was to pray for someone who has actually harmed us or wronged us. Someone who we think would never get saved. Two things happen when we pray for them:
a) The gospel is exalted because we affirm that it has the power to save anyone. No matter who you are and what you’ve done, the good news (that Jesus Christ died and rose again) is able to deliver you from the wrath of God. That’s the powerful message we communicate when we pray for those that are against us or against the gospel. Do we really believe that the gospel is “good news for all”? Even the worst of sinners?
b) God is glorified because we reflect the heart of God when we pray and desire their salvation. We show ourselves to be God’s children by wanting our “enemies” and people unlike us come to the knowledge of the Savior. If we ourselves were enemies of God who were shown immense mercy and patience through the gospel, how can we be self righteous to not make that same prayer for others no matter how cruel or wicked they’ve been?
Today’s passage jumps off where we left. The context is about prayer…praying for all kinds of people so that they get saved and come to the knowledge of truth.
V8 says: I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarrelling.
We are talking about church Gatherings here. Paul is obviously not saying that only men can pray in a Gathering but I think he’s pointing toward men taking the lead as they offer various prayers for various people.
“Lifting holy hands” is a typical posture for prayer in the Bible. Few examples are:
Psalm 63:4: I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands.
God tells the sinful Israelites in Isaiah 1:15, “When you spread out your hands, I will hide my eyes from you; even though you make many prayers, I will not listen; your hands are full of blood”.
And then he goes on to add “without anger or quarrelling”…what is he trying to say here?
He’s probably saying that because anger and quarrelling was an issue in the Ephesian church. It could probably be the result of controversial teachings that were being propagated by false teachers. So Paul wrote this to Timothy so that he could bring order to their church meetings. Also what I think he’s trying to say here is that the lives of men who profess faith in Christ should be defined not by anger or quarrelling but by prayer. Isn’t that profound but also convicting?
If people from within the church and outside the church would be asked to describe you based on your lifestyle, what would they say about it? Would they say it’s defined by prayer? Or would they say that it’s defined by quarrels and anger?
One of the things that men generally struggle with is a desire for respect and pride. We are always crying and demanding respect from various people in our lives. Our parents, our spouse, our colleagues, our friends and our church family as well. When we don’t receive it, we end up quarrelling.
What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions[a] are at war within you?[b] 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. (James 4:1-3)
Men, the reason why there are constant quarrels and fights is not because of the other person or the circumstance but because of your sinful desires. If the way you deal with tough times and conflicts is by fighting over it instead of bringing it to God in prayer, the truth is that you struggle with a great deal of pride and selfishness. And that speaks a lot about whom we trust and whom are we trying to please. Are we really trusting God or are we trusting and trying to please ourselves? Our lifestyle displays what we believe. Our lifestyle communicates what we love.
Luke 6:45: for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.
What would it take for us to be identified as men that are prayerful?
9 likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, 10 but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.
When Paul instructs the women, he tells how they should be defined by their “good works” and not what they wear. And this is a huge deal for women. In today’s time, this might seem to restrict a woman’s right to wear whatever she wants to wear.
Let me phrase the same question that was phrased to the men, if people from within the church and outside the church would be asked to describe you based on your lifestyle, what would they say about it? Would they say it’s defined by good works? Or would they say it’s defined by the external and what you wear?
And I think while the struggle with men is with pride, women generally on the other hand struggle with acceptance. Therefore, what they wear gives them self worth. That feeling of being accepted by people. The instruction here is to not adorn themselves with costly clothing and fancy hair and jewelry but to adorn themselves with good works.
3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. (1 Pet 3:3-6)
What this passage says is what God actually views as beautiful is not the external adornment but the gentleness and character of the heart. A submissive heart is what God finds very precious! One may ask, “Well is there something wrong in trying to look nice?” No, there’s nothing wrong. However, if most of our effort and time is spent in making us look attractive externally rather than considering how can we serve and love Christ and people, then it is an issue of the heart which needs to be addressed.
What would it take to be identified as a woman of good works?
And I think the gospel addresses both of these issues that men and women face. Our struggle with pride and acceptance can be addressed by the gospel. When we understand how big, Holy and loving God is and how sinful we are in the light of His holiness, it completely crushes the pride in us. We realize the only way we can have a restored relationship with the Creator is by trusting in a Wonderful Savior and not in ourselves. The cheap thrill that we have by exalting ourselves and fighting for our pride is thrown away when we receive the true Joy giver.
On the other hand, we know that through Christ we are fully loved and accepted by God. There’s no greater fulfillment and satisfaction than knowing that our Creator and Redeemer has totally accepted us. So we’re freed to pursue what God has called us to do.
Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve;14 and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor. 15 Yet she will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control.
Now what does Paul mean here? If we don’t understand the context and the reason for what Paul is saying we might assume that he is being chauvinistic. So let’s dig deep to know what the context is?
Is Paul trying to say that women cannot speak in Gatherings?
No, because in 1 Cor 11:5 Paul talks about order in worship out there and he clearly describes women who pray and prophesy.
but every wife[c] who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, since it is the same as if her head were shaven
Just to clarify on this verse that head covering in the Corinthian culture, a married woman who uncovered her head in public brought shame to her husband. As you can see in v5, praying and prophesying by women was permitted or he wouldn’t have mentioned this example.
But someone may say “what about 1 Cor 14:33-35 where there is a similar instruction?”
As in all the churches of the saints, 34 the women should keep silent in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission, as the Law also says. 35 If there is anything they desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in church.
Again to understand this, we’ll need to look at the immediate context which is v29: Let two or three prophets speak, and let the others weigh what is said. The context dealt with examination and critique of prophecies which is more a ruling or governing function of the church.
Therefore, even in 1 Tim 2:11, when Paul says she is to learn quietly in submissiveness, he’s not saying that she cannot speak at all but the reference is to v12 where he says:
12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man
Now if you remember from last week, the elder has three roles: feeding the church, caring for the church and protecting the church. Teaching and exercising authority over a man are roles fulfilled by the elder in a biblical church. Teaching is how the church is fed by the Word of God and exercising authority is the governing authority to lead, care and protect the church.
One may ask, “what if the woman is gifted to teach? What about that?”
13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve; 14 and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.
It’s interesting how Paul doesn’t talk about culture as the reason for this mandate but goes back to Creation to show how this was the order in God’s design.
Adam was created first by God. In God’s mind, the leadership at home was given to the man. That was his role. This in no way makes the woman unequal. There is a difference in role but both have equal worth, importance and value. Both men and women are equally important and valuable to God.
So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them. (Gen 1:27)
The second reason Paul gives is Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.
Again, Paul isn’t trying to blame Eve for the fall and say Adam was innocent but he was trying to point to something else that happened in the Garden.
Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made.
He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You[a] shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?” 2 And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, 3 but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” 4 But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. 5 For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise,[b] she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. 7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loin cloths. (Gen 3:1-7)
Adam was present with Eve at the time when she was being tempted. His responsibility was also to protect the spiritual life in the home. He silently watched and participated in the act of disobedience instead of preserving the faith of the family while Eve took the lead. This role reversal resulted in the Fall of mankind. Satan attacked the male headship of the home when he spoke to Eve and deceived her. Paul probably is stating this to show how disastrous it can be when men don’t ascribe to God’s design and take up spiritual leadership in the church.
This is not to say that women are incapable of teaching the Bible. In fact a woman in a church might be better gifted at teaching but the office to lead and shepherd the church is for a man. In Titus 2, it urges mature woman in the faith to disciple younger women and children. Their gifts can still be used in the church but differently. For eg: if me and my wife did the same thing and didn’t have different roles, our home wouldn’t function properly. Each of us have different skills which we bring to the table but our roles are distinct.
Another question would be, “can a woman participate/help in other ministries of the church like example worship/music ministry?”
The only exception given biblically is with respect to the office of an elder. Yes, she can help in other ministries. Regarding worship leading, the Gathering doesn’t view worship leading as an office of an elder. The person leading worship isn’t teaching expositionally nor does the person exercise any authority. Reading scripture, selecting songs, prayer can and should have participation of women. I think the concern would be if a man came up to Jane or Angela and asked them to pastor/lead him.
We realize that God desires and has ordained for men to be the spiritual leaders at home and in the church. In God’s heart, this was the best way (complementary roles) to reflect the harmonious interpersonal relationship within the Trinity. In the God Head, all members are equal in worth and personhood yet they have different roles.
So what’s the application here?
One of the reasons why I feel women have had to step up in the last few years has been because men have been passive and lazy toward their responsibility of spiritual leadership. In my experience in youth ministry for a few years and also the churches I’ve been to, it’s been sad to see a minority of men participating, getting involved and leading people in the faith. “Where are the men?” is a question often asked. God’s church requires faithful, reliable and prayerful men who will lead their families and the church to know and love God more. You don’t have to know everything or even be smarter than the women to lead. God calls men to lead by taking the initiative.
The encouragement to women would be to continue to actively participate in all the different ways that God has designed for them with the variety of gifts that they’ve been given. However, if they notice a pattern where there’s only a female initiative in evangelism, bible studies or discipleship…it would be good to just have a word with the men gently encouraging them to take the lead in those areas. This I think works well in a context of a husband/wife relationship where the wife can gently encourage her husband to take the lead and also in the context of close GC relationships because we see how God has called and designed different roles in the family of God to display who He is.
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